Finding Happy

Does everyone find happiness at some point in their life?

I remember when I was in college, of having a feeling that there was something missing. I was not happy. I knew this, and also knew that this was a transition time, so to speak, for better things to come.  I tried my best to focus on the prize.  A degree, a job, moving out of Rolla MO, away from heartache and onto happier things!  During this time I really felt that void of being happy.  I tried to fill it with material things as most would do.  I tried to fix up my apartment, thinking a nicer place to live would help bring the happy.  I tried spicing up my wardrobe, thinking that if I thought I looked good, I would feel happier.  I tried to make new friends, hoping that one of them could make me happy.  None of those things really did a damn thing to make me happy.   I also surrounded myself with that certain someone who also was not happy…ever.  That didn’t help my situation in the slightest.

Shortly after graduating I found myself in a new town, new job with new friends.  A fresh start.  I started enjoying myself.  I kept close with my true friends from college and that made my situation even happier.  I began to long less for new clothes or new furniture and began to really enjoy my life.   I felt content, happy.   I remember telling a friend that I was waiting for “everything to come crashing down” because I wasn’t used to this awesome feeling.   I could no longer feel that void I had held onto for so many years.

Since adding a husband and two beautiful boys to the equation I am understanding what Happy is for me!  I am grateful for what I have in my life and try to enjoy it everyday…whether it is a whining, crying mess or not 🙂  The void is fully gone. 

I also have realized that some are still looking for what is “Happiness” for themselves.  Still searching for that next new outfit or new friend to come along…those things may now have evolved to new jobs, new cities, new occupations, new make them happy.  I call these people ‘The Grass is Always Greener” people.  Not mockingly or in a mean way, but in reference to the fact that they are still looking for that “thing” to make them happy, always on to the next idea or plan.  Hoping that maybe “this time” they will find what they are looking for. 

This city is too hot, this city is too cold, this city is too big, this city is too small.  This job gives me no control, this job expects too much.  This drive is too long, this drive is too short.  Maybe if I try to be a chef, maybe if I try to be a lawyer, maybe if I buy a house on a lake, maybe if I try to be a superhero…Okay so I made that last one up but you get the point. 

I am very thankful for my happiness and that I found “it” whatever the exact ‘it” may be.  Maybe it was one defining moment or maybe a combination?  Either way I am thankful I have it and hope that eventually everyone finds their own. 

Does everyone eventually find “it”??  I am beginning to wonder if some will always be searching…



3 thoughts on “Finding Happy

  1. Count me in the searching category. Yes, there are moments of happiness, but there has to something more fulfilling that what currently is. While life is not bad, there has to be a greater purpose in life. Happiness seems so fleeting. Contentment seems so hard to maintain. Troubles come. Things happen. Disappointments abound. I constantly feel like I am settling for what is, even though I yearn for what could be. It isn’t necessarily things, but more of a joy and optimism for each new day. Life is more of a checklist of bad things to resolve each day, than an adventure waiting to be explored.

    Kudos to you who have found real happiness in life, the feeling must be unexplainable.

    • Mark, I feel that men are at a disadvantage in this department also. I can say that the whole having a bay experience really seals the deal for me. Having that connection to someone really seemed to help me learn who I was and what I was about. I am good at many things, I can play softball fairly well, play volleyball, paint a room, decorate cakes, be an engineer but I am only good at those things. I think i am really great at being a mom and that really helped me find my happy place! Not soley, but really locked it in place. Even though being a father is equally as important, you guys are neglected of that strong connection, feeling, of growing someone, being there with them at every moment. Women might complain about the whole child birth thing but i think it is a total bonus for us that you guys miss out on! I also think maintaining happiness will be work, but I am happy to put forth the effort 🙂

  2. Happy is contentment with who you are with what you have with where you are. Well, it sounds nice when my yoga teacher says it. In reality, now, with two boys, happy is a warm shower, an extra fifteen minutes of sleep, and the buzz from my first morning coffee.

Thanks for reading what {Che} said! Now tell me what {You} would like to say! I appreciate your comments and read each and every one of them! These *might* be the highlight in my day!

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